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July 31, 1997

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"We are flesh and blood, we can not be abstract spirits." -- Dr Lionel Fernandes

A catherdral W hen you first join up to become a priest, you are enthusiastic. You are dead sure, or you think you're dead sure, of what you're getting into… But, somewhere along the way, you realise the life you've chosen isn't so easy after all," admits Russel Pinto (name changed on request), a marketing executive who spent four years of his life studying to be a priest before realising "it wasn't my vocation in life."

"It's not about the hard work involved, I always wanted to work for my brothers and I still try to incorporate that aspect of it. But I think sex is natural, it's human and, as a young boy, it's difficult to keep from fantasising and looking at women. The guilt that results from such temptations, because you know you've taken a vow of celibacy, is killing." But while Pinto admits that celibacy can be difficult to handle, he also says it wasn't the reason why he left the seminary.

However, cynics believe celibacy could be one of the issues responsible for people's reluctance to join the Church. But Fr Gracias, who has been a priest since 1962, claims, "There is only a marginal decrease in the number of students joining up. For example, there were 200 students when I joined and, at present, there are 157 students. Also, you can't actually say that this decrease is due to the celibacy issue; there are various other factors that play a role. For one, we have become more strict with admissions. In the past, boys would join the seminary soon after they finished school. Today, we insist on graduation."

He continues with his explanation, "This means the boys are older, more mature and they have been exposed to college life outside the seminary. So, if they still decide to join the seminary, it is a conscious decision. There is also a definite demographic change that has contributed to the fall. Now families are smaller and becoming a priest is no longer the status symbol it once was. Parents and children alike have become more ambitious. Besides, there are more options available to the masses."

In the past, it was a traditional understood that at least one member of the family would join the priesthood. Today, the decision is solely left to the individual. "My parents did not know I had come to the seminary for an interview," says Suren Abreu, who had completed his masters in science before joining up. Not only have all the seminarians completed graduation outside the seminary, quite a few of them have even worked for a few years before making their choice.

"One reason that dissuades the boys from joining up is the long period of studying," says Joseph Kuriakose, a middle-aged man who was once a student at the seminary. It takes eight years of studying before seminarians can be ordained as priests. The boys who apply to the seminary are interviewed on several issues, including the reason as to why they wish to become priests. During the course of the eight years, the students cover languages, a year of living and working outside the college, two years of philosophy and four years of theology. "Halfway through," says Kuriakose, "you begin to wonder whether you are going to make it. The fear of being alone eventually got to me and I made the decision to leave. Today, I do not regret my decision."

"Many of the people who join up leave midway or even towards the end because they realise that they cannot handle the life of a priest," says Gracias. "Even after they are ordained, they have a choice to leave priesthood at any time if they are unhappy with their decision. It is better, though, if they make their decision before the ordination ceremony. Leaving priesthood after ordination leads to unnecessary complications; the former priest may face difficulties in being accepted as a member of society."

While it is difficult to lay the blame for lack of vocation on the celibacy issue alone, it still a mystery to many as to why the vow of celibacy is so important to the Roman Catholic religion. "We must understand that celibacy is a lifestyle, one that helps ministry," says Fr Gracias. "There are several factors behind why priests take this decision. Among them are the factors of mobility and accessibility. As priests, we are constantly being transferred; if I was attached, this wouldn't be fair to my family. My children would have relocate in several schools, make new friends, etc. Keeping this scenario in mind, it is much more sensible and practical for a priest to be unattached."

"I would find it difficult to divide my time and energy between the Church and my family," adds Melroy. "It wouldn't be fair to either of them as I would not be able to give either one my best shot." While Melroy's answer seems a valid explanation for the choice he has made, he will need the will and courage live up to it for the rest of life.

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