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January 2, 1998

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Indian cricket -- verse, and worse

Hemant Kenkre

To ring in the new year, is a small offering based on the traditional Yuletide song. This is inspired by the fortitude that you fans have shown while watching the fortunes of Indian cricket over the last year.

I have dedicated this humble offering to all the wonderful people associated with Indian cricket, who have given us a truly memorable 1997. My sincere thanks go to the notables without whose support this would never have been possible. These include the ICC president, the BCCI president and secretary, Bob Simpson, a few cricketers past and present (including the captain), Justice Chandrachud and, of course, the cricket fan.

It is my fervent wish that these luminaries continue to serve the game in the same fashion, this coming year, as they have in the one just ended. Come to think of it, I have no doubt that they will, in 1998, surpass themselves and make 1997 seem a pale shadow of the real thing.

Meanwhile, let me wish all cricket lovers out there a happy and fruitful 1998.

On the first day of Christmas
The wise men gave to me
A team with no cream
Omitting Karnataka's three

On the second day of Christmas
My Fixtures Committee gave to me
A brown strip in Indore
Which lasted for overs three

On the third day of Christmas
The Justice gave to me
A report which had everything else
But no reference to me

On the fourth day of Christmas
The Hunter gave to me
An autographed lawyers brief
All maligning me

On the fifth day of Christmas
The BCCI gave to me
An invitation to coach
And consult for free

On the sixth day of Christmas
The Dalmiya faction gave to me
A dud vote, the Finance Minister's wife and..
A major kick in the knee

On the seventh day of Christmas
The Star TV commentator gave to me
Advise about tomorrow
While I was running out for tea

On the eighth day of Christmas
The team management gave to me
Two free trips abroad
They could have well carried a tree

On the ninth day of Christmas
Five Santas gave to me
A sack full of sorrow
With no Pepsi

On the tenth day of Christmas
My chelas gave to me
A lot of trouble
While I'm happy at the ICC

On the eleventh day of Christmas
The umpire gave to me
A head-scratching finger
Much to my glee

On the twelfth day of Christmas
The players and the BCCI cheated me
With three boring tests and a pitch
On which I'd like to pee!

Hemant Kenkre

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